elizabeth geyer

I am very sad to hear that Bruce Lundvall just passed away. I never met him in person. But two years a friend saw Bruce being interviewed on a TV show about Eva Cassidy, After watching the show he tracked down an email for Bruce and wrote to him about my music and how much of an inspiration Eva Cassidy had been to me. To our amazement Bruce not only got the email but phoned Paul the next day and asked if he could send him some of  my music. After he received the album Bruce called again. He seemed to be genuinely excited about what he had heard and wanted another album.   Over the next year, as we started recording my new album, Bruce became a kind of 'champion' to me , a human angel if that makes sense. Sometimes he would leave a phone message just to say he was still listening. When I went to America I was finally able to meet Bruce myself over the phone and we had a couple of very long conversations. I was so nervous, knowing this man signed some of the biggest music names in the world including Norah Jones, Herbie Hancock, Willie Nelson and countless others. Even  my trumpet hero Freddie Hubbard!

 But my nerves faded. We talked  about not just my music but his life and  everything including what a tough time he was having with Parkinson's disease. He was already losing some of his independence. Still he continued to  try to help, playing my music on his radio show and said he would try to get me signed.  He also loved  the three new tracks we sent him. We planned to get to New York to meet in person, but unfortunately ran out of time due to recording. Sadly my album was not yet finished and Bruce's health was deteriorating badly by then. Even his speech was difficult. Contact  became limited this past year as he had moved into assisted care.

  It's still magical to me that someone like Bruce  reached out as genuinely and often as  he did. I didn't know Bruce for long, or arguably even very well. But from our conversations it was clear he lived for music and somehow hadn't become hardened in his heart by a whole lifetime at the top of the music BUSINESS.  I'm only one, but he has been a light on my own musical path. But all of his phenomenal musical achievements aside, more than anything, Bruce struck me as a good guy - humble and genuine. Who deeply loved music.

There is a new song in me, I have  a strong feeling, that is busting to get out, and today I actually get to do that.  Life is simpler than it has been for as long as I can remember, and if I had to define 'luxury', it's not money but time. Sure maybe money can buy time but it just as often seems to end up buying more things and a complicated life. Luxury I think is time -   to write songs and in my journal and to listen - to music, God and others when they are talking, to read, walk, be present. It's incredible to have a new album almost ready to go, to be able to think about future albums. The internet, which I curse when I see the whole world on their phones instead of talking to each other, on the flip side also means I can share this new music soon with others. I'm so grateful for this time.

I am excited. Why? I don't know. The future is unknown yet again.  I am excited about the unknown, what is possible, change, travel, music. I am missing the gigs but  I've never felt closer to who I always wanted to be, making the music that is most exciting and romantic to me.

I wish you a happy Easter. It's starting to feel like winter here and I am happy to be spending today just singing and working on new songs. I was thinking about how some people are much more social than others. All of us long to be connected or to contribute to others in some way. But every person seems to be wired differently. I have always loved solitude. I spent decades trying to please others, even those I love, and loved, ironically often failing, and socializing often because others wanted me to. Eventually something had to change. I am so grateful to finally be giving myself more permission to do what I dreamed about deep down which was a quiet life making music as more of an observer, following inspiration. I treasure my few close relationships and family. Life is very low key. Others say sometimes that I'm too reclusive and maybe I am. But every person's path is different and I'm doing the very best I can given the path I've been on. Whatever you are up to today and with whomever you're spending it with, in a traditional way or not, have a beautiful Easter. 

Life has gone full circle.  Ideas that once made me feel only hemmed in,  eg life in the suburbs  (I grew up in the suburbs)  now fascinate me. I spent time in the big cities I always dreamed about and I do want to go back. But I also don't mind wherever I am anymore.  Everywhere has its own 'magic'.

At the same time it also all blurs together sometimes. The sun goes up, the sun comes down and people turn out to be pretty much the same everywhere we go?  

I love this song I found by Paul Voudouris 'Wherever you go, there you are'  http://t.co/EogOYlxXfH . The real constant that counts in the end is ourselves, who we are.

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I met this dog.

Life is a mixed bag and perspective isn't always easy. When I think of all I've given up (most recently, all my regular gigs including those I loved, to go work at a meat department in a supermarket) and all I've lost (a marriage, my heart once broke to pieces, friendships I thought would last but didn't) and how different life IS from how I thought it might be and it sometimes it all doesn't even make sense to me, let alone anyone else.

But we make our choices and I never wanted what was sensible or comfortable!  All I ever wanted to do is turn life into the best music I possibly could and find a way to record and share it.

So as someone who is  a vegetarian by default and happens to work in a meat department for the moment, all I can know is that in some bizarre way things are unfolding as they are supposed to. I realized a couple of days ago that to this point all my best growth has still really only happened on the inside.  But then again I've always been drawn to late bloomers!